bad news

Everyone should know that the most important things I write are at the beginning and the end of my posts. Quite often the crap in the middle is mindless parasocial conversation. There's very little I follow from my reader's lives, (unless of course you're all keeping blogs that I can follow!) though I would be interested in reading/hearing about. Therefore, I'm starting this post with my Scottish address! I'd love to be a bit more personable with people reading, so if you send a note in the mail or even just an email, I'd be certain to respond individually. Without further distraction:

Jakob W. Plummer

5/26 Geddes Court

Stirling University

Stirling, Scotland

FK9 4LR

Email: jakobplummer@gmail.com (simple enough)

And by all means, don't feel obligated to send postage. I know it's $1.08 for an international postcard to be sent, and if I get too many, I'll go broke from here. It's 87p to send one from Scotland. (Which is equivalent to 1.31USD. I'm definitely getting ripped off)

Now, onto different matters, I have to admit that Wednesday blogs are far more difficult for me to write. Rarely does anything happen of significant value to discuss between Sunday evening and Wednesday. I have classes on both Monday and Tuesday, which is about as exciting as it gets. Unless course I go into great detail of my course work, which this week included watching two documentaries and studying the work of Leni Riefenstahl. The two films were Night & Fog and The Road to Treblinka. Needless to say, all four hours of lecture and viewing were a bit disconsolate. I wouldn't suggest watching either unless strictly for academic purposes. 

So with no new news (say that five times fast!) specifically relating to me and my travels, I will share some of the most [insert ambiguous adjective here] discoveries so far on my trip. Don't worry. They should all be taken comically. At least most of them

1. When discussing the largest city in Illinois....

    THE AMERICAN: 'Wait... I don't even know the biggest city in Illinois.'

    THE DANE: 'It's Chicago.' 

    ME: '..........'

2. When discussing recent news of North Korea's toings...

    THE (SAME) AMERICAN: 'I have a friend who studied in North Korea.'

    ME: 'I'm pretty sure that's not true.'

3. The sheep are rude. They don't like people. They especially don't like people who run at them on cliffs!

4. The 'C' word is used constantly. Just as much as you would hear someone called an ass in America. 

Meanwhile, Signs that read 'Need a fag?' are actually referring to cigarettes. 

5. When trying to set up a doctor appointment for a sudden illness...

     ME: 'I'd like to see the doctor.'

     RECEPTIONIST: 'Did you call at 8:00AM?'

     ME: 'What?'

     RECEPTIONIST: 'You need to call at 8:00AM the day of the appointment.'

     ME: 'Well can I schedule one for tomorrow.'

     RECEPTIONIST: 'If you call at 8:00.'

     ME: 'Goodbye.'

6. I never ended up seeing the doctor. Too much hassel. My friend Barbara did, however. The first day she called the lines were busy. When they finally answered at 8:05 the receptionist told her she has to call at 8:00. All the appointments for the day had been filled. But wait, it gets better. The next day she calls and because she can't understand the receptionist's thick, Scottish accent, she had to hand the phone to someone else to sort the details out. When providing information for the appointment, the receptionist stated that someone had just walked in the door and taken her appointment time with a different receptionist. The third day Barbara got an appointment. She went in and was told by the doctor to drink more water and just let the cold pass. As for her fever, she was advised to use a cold cloth. I guess you get what you pay for. 

7. Stirling University is free for Scotland citizens. Plus, they get a monthly allowance check from the government. One Scottish friend had said high schoolers used to get the money too, but with budget cuts they slashed their allowance. Rough life, right?

8. There's an entire section in the library that's called 'Short-Term' loan. These books you can check out for either 3 hours or 24 hours. Yes, you can renew as many times as you want, but what's the point if you have to do it every 3 hours? 

9.  The squirrels are friendlier here than anywhere I've been. And I've seen some friendly squirrels! If you're unfortunate enough to have a tree outside your window, they will come in if the window is open. They will eat food. They will wake people up. My friend Tina woke up to a squirrel on her desk the other night. Thank goodness I don't have a tree outside my room because I would flip my s**t if I woke up to a squirrel in my room. And before you say 'Why don't you close your windows' it's because we have radiators that keep our rooms too warm. You can barely sleep if you don't crack it open.

10. The washer and dryer are in a different building. While this is good training for my future as a New Yorker, I argue that 4 washers and 4 dryers for 2 buildings worth of students is unacceptable. I have, however, learned to wear clothes more conservatively. If it's not dirty, I can wear it again (excluding underwear of course)

That's all I have off the top of my head. I hope some made you laugh or at least smile because now I have bad news. Due to my increasingly demanding schedule of actually creating films, I must once again lesser my posts. To keep things fresh and more desirable, I will only be posting on Sundays. Just like your favorite TV shows, you'll only get me once a week from here on out.

Below is a haunting picture I took earlier in the week. The quote I found to be fitting in more ways than just one. 

"Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore."

                                   -Edgar Allan Poe